A Puppy for Christmas? Five Questions Before You Say Yes

The picture is wonderful: the children come down on Christmas morning and there he is. I understand the pull of it. I also know what the second week of January looks like, because our house lived it. The house empties, the adults go back to work, the children go back to school, and the puppy is still there, needing exactly what he needed on Christmas Day.

If a puppy is in your plans for Christmas, these are the five questions to ask now, in November, while the answer can still change.

1. Who is at home in the second week of January?

Not Christmas week. Everyone is home at Christmas, and a puppy with six people around him all day is easy. Ask about the ordinary Tuesday in January. Who takes him out at seven? Who comes back at midday? Who is awake at ten at night? If the honest answer is "we'll work it out", the puppy will work it out for you, and you will not like the result.

2. Is the house ready, or is the wrapping ready?

A house that is ready has decided which rooms the puppy enters and which he does not, where he sleeps, where his bed and water go, and which doors stay shut. It has one set of words everyone will use with him. It has a place where a frightened or tired person can go and know the puppy will not follow. None of that fits in a box with a bow on it, and all of it matters more than the box.

3. Has everyone said yes, including the person who is least sure?

A Christmas puppy is usually a surprise for someone. Make sure that someone is not the adult who will end up doing most of the work, or the one who is afraid of dogs. In our house the person who had to live with the dog was my wife, and she was frightened of dogs. The dog who finally stayed was the one we planned around her comfort, before he arrived, not after. A surprise takes that choice away from exactly the person who needs it most.

4. Where is he coming from, and have you asked the questions?

The weeks before Christmas are the busiest weeks of the year for people who sell puppies badly. Ask to see the puppy with his mother where he was born. Ask how old he will be when he comes home. Ask whether the breeder or rescue will take him back, at any age, if things go wrong. Ask what health checks the parents have had. A good breeder answers all of this without hesitating, and asks you plenty in return. Someone who wants a deposit by Friday and no questions asked is telling you something.

5. What happens in the bad week?

Every house with a new puppy has a bad week. Broken nights, accidents on the floor, a child who has lost interest, an adult who is quietly wondering what they have done. The families who come through it are the ones who decided beforehand what a bad week would look like and what they would do: who gets up, who gets a night off, who calls the trainer. The families who did not plan for it think the bad week is the verdict. It is not. It is the first week where the plan is tested.

One suggestion about the date

If the answers are good, bring him home after the holiday, not during it. The second or third week of January, when the house is quiet, the routine is back, and someone is home every day for the first stretch. Give the children a collar, a lead and a photograph on Christmas morning, and the promise of a date. The puppy will not know the difference. The house will.

And if the answers are not good yet, the kindest thing you can do for the puppy is to wait. Maybe later is a complete answer.

Free help

The free pack Before he comes home covers the first week's real hours, who in the house owns which job, and how the first forty-eight hours should go: mohamedabukhadra.com/help/before-he-comes-home.

My book Before You Say Yes to the Dog takes a family through the whole decision and ends with a readiness test that gives one of three honest answers.

Related: My Child Wants a Dog. Have This Conversation First · Puppy's First Night at Home: Decide This Before Bedtime

I am a father, not a trainer, a vet or a behaviourist. This is what worked in my house. Anything that touches safety, check with a professional who can see your dog and your home.